Im laying trying to get comfortable enough to sleep and i just cant with my bra digging into me. But im hooked up to my drip and i dont wanna pester my nurse to unhook me so i can get my arm out the strap because im gonna have to pester him in about 15 minutes when my infusion finishes anyway. I will choose ny battles and I can wait and be uncomfortable 15 minutes more. Its not like im gonna get into a deep sleep in that time anyway...
Which nicely leads me on to another reason I cant wait to be home... the fact that if im well enough to go home, Im well enough to not need to be hooked up to a drip for 7 and a half hours a day, and I wont need to ask permission to use the toilet or move more than a foot away from my bed. I also wont have to wear these stupid non-slip socks everyone has to wear when I'm on my feet. I mean, im kind of glad because they do conceal the true extent of my crustiness and ugly toes but its a faff I cant be arsed with. Dont even get me started on the tight TED stockings I have to wear too to stop me getting blood clots because Im spending too much time in bed and its not good for circulation. Ive started to boycott them already. Trick is to wear something long enough to cover your ankles and keep your socks on. The nurses will never know. Theres no way of getting round the blood thinning injections in your tummy to stop blood clots though. The nurses are on the ball with that one. But at least it doesnt hurt. It just stings a bit. (but the area that it stings is such a tiny pinprick that if you cant handle it you really need a slap):
I also wont miss whoever the phantom poop smearer is. Not just skids in the toilet but all over the toilet seat too the past couple of days. I know me strolling out to get the nurse whilr my bowl of piss is still chilling in the loo isnt the most pleasant thing to walk in on but there was shit on the floor this evening. And you can only notice the smears surrounding the toilet once youre committed to the act and already sat on the loo. Honestly. I know youre sick but if you cant clean it up yourself the nurses here are nice enough to do it for you! Were all meant to be in this
together.
Another thing i wont miss is ward meal times. Call me a hypocrite because ive always said i love hospital food (which i still do) but having to eat at such specific times and being restricted to microwavable meals and trifle gets boring and kinda neausiating after a while. While im in here i can be as demanding as i want and have whatever meal i fancied delivered to me via mum dad sister or cousin within the same day though, and i will deffo be missing that after discharge.
I think ill miss being a demanding brat in general actually. This call bell opens the doors for anything. Cant be arsed to get out of bed to turn the light off? Call bell. Feel cold and want the windows to be shut and get tucked under an extra blanket? Call bell. Ran out of water? Call bell. It is like having servants in here. The nurses must hate me. But i cant strongly day that i love them.
I will miss the little community they have here too. Everyone is so nice and unjudgemental. God knows what it takes to put up with me for 3 weeks with my dry skin swanning around and having to measure my piss every 45 minutes, but somehow they all do it and with a smile on their face. Nurses definately dont get enough recognition for everything they do and how much they accomodate. If i could grant them all their wishes i would.
Anyway i might actually be tired enough to try and sleep now. Which i should do seeing as the day starts at about 5:30 in the morning and where my room is it is impossible to sleep after then. Its right next to the entrance, storage room where they wheel in and out the big metal carts of laundry and equipment, all the metal bins that get changed what feels like 600 times a day and the nurses station where they all have to coverse and organise. But hey, free rent. I should not complain.
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